Trousers of Time

The way that I understand the omnipresence in inexplicableness of God is also the way that I understand the organised chaos theory. Through the trousers of time. I believe Terry Pratchett first introduced me to the Trousers of Time. The way it works is this. At any arbitrary point in time you can make a decision. For example weather to wear my unban camo trousers or my denim jeans. Once I have put on one set the the universe will be irrevocably altered. Just like trousers you can either put the left leg in first or the right. And since time (for us) only moves the one direction you cannot change your mind part way through. You can imagine what the universe would’ve been like if you were wearing urban camo but there is no way to know. Unless you are God. Trousers are like a fork in the road and also like a fork in the road there will be more choices to make. Will I have Spaghetti bog for tea or Spaghetti and meatballs? Now you have two Trouser like splits in time giving rise to four different possible universes. Its like trousers stuck on the leg of the trousers you just put on. And the choices go on forever, and sometimes there are even three legged trousers. Eventually the possibilities would end up like a plate of spaghetti.

I believe God can see every possible choice of trousers, be they camo or jeans, and can accurately depict what the universe would be like with any combination of trousers and spaghetti. Even where separate time streams recombine. For there are times when it is irrelevant to your choice of tea what trousers you are wearing. So regardless of your choice of Urban Camo you will still end up with the choice of Spaghetti bog or Spaghetti and meatballs. God doesn’t exist outside of the bowl of spaghetti he lives in it with us, but he can clearly comprehend every set of trousers.

So, our lives travel along one of these strands of spaghetti, like a photon in a fibre optic cable, twisting and turning wherever the spaghetti will take us. At each junction we make a choice and travel down one branch and not the other. Thus our reality is completely linear like a game of F3AR. Also unlike movies time always moves in the same direction and at the same pace, so we can never remake a decision once decided. Thus there is only one possible reality that we can experience.

But wait, what about the game F3AR? Is that not an alternate reality that can be experienced? Movies too, they are like our reality but strange things happen, like aliens building pyramids that then get attacked by Decepticons because a boy fell in love. Then if things can be experienced and shared they must exist, as per the qualification “I think therefore I am”. It’s also possible for me to imagine what life could’ve been like if I had chosen Jeans. Is that not nearly looking into a different strand of spaghetti in the trousers of time? But we still cant really get into these alternate realities for we always exist in the current one. Its sort of like a psionic translation or a sojourn of the soul then, after a while we reincarnate and return to the real world. I think these are like the meatballs in the spaghetti. You can access them from different places in the time stream but they are always the same; Some of them like movies can be accessed by lots of people while others like daydreams can only be accessed by you. And like two fibre optic cables, photons can only cross the divide when they touch each other. You can get lost within a meatball but eventually, you must reincarnate back to your original universe, the linear one.

So thats kind of how I understand Life, the Universe and the Trousers of Time. God knows the spin on every atom and every outcome that is possible from a single electron changing spin. To me life looks like complete and utter chaos. But yet it also kind of makes sence, at least I like to think so.